Why can’t the world decide for once and tell me the rules of life, what should I think, what I should do. Once and for all…consistent rules, standard rules…as clearly put as the periodic table in chemistry.
Why can’t the world tell me how to react in every scenario and know a person when I look in his eyes? How can I know what to think assume and expect? When different people say different things…even same people say different things.
There are times when I suffer because I don’t speak my heart; and many times I suffer because I did. I suffer when I talk and share; and many times the reason for miseries is said to be lack of communication
There are times when I suffer because I have faith in a person and many times because I have none. Why can some one question me all the time, and I should believe in their each word.
Why should I be told I am indulging and asking for too much when I ask for a life I want; and why another set of people say my problem is that I don’t fight enough.
Why cant people see I am trying to do good and sticking to the values and if these are the wrong set of values tell me the right one.
At times I am told my problems are because I am alone and at times my problems are because I seek someone.
And how can it be my mistake all the time.
Especially when everyone is as clueless.
I can’t listen to people and learn. Because the people who say they know what to do are usually lying and just know what I can do for them. They are equally confused and cynical.
And life teaches nothing. It just confuses. And time, It treats like you have signed up for a roll-a-costar ride. Happiness and despondency being a defined path, making sure just when you start to believe you are doing good, something or someone will slap you on the face and prove you are an idiot.
Why doesn’t life stops to talk, explain give a roadmap; which freeway and what exit to take.
Why doesn’t it cut me open and change from inside whatever needs to be changed and fix everything that needs to be fixed. I cant be pretending to be what I am not. So change me completely; mold me like a lump of clay as per the requirement of the world…once for ever…even a period is good.
I am waiting for god to start the tutorial classes for life…..